Friday, April 30, 2004
just a quickie..... well a few days back i wrote about Eamon and his ex girlfriend, talking about how much swearing was in their lyrics. Well my friend Lynn, came up with another song, which is probably even worse, and popped it in her blog ... well heres a few more Cameltosis by Korn and this whole page of lyrics by a group called Lividity which I won't copy onto my blog, but if you so want to , just click and go read.
THE DOGS BOLLOX
dogs bollocks
Meaning
Excellent - the absolute apex.
Origin
No doubt coined from dogs' habit of licking the aforementioned organs in preference to almost any other activity.
from the previous posting you could be forgiven for thinking that it is only in the world of crime that a top dog, dogs bollox haircut will get you to the top, this would be an easy mistake to make, but if you look at the media, the news , movies, cult tv etc etc, you will see that hair is a contributing factor in greatness. Great hair is important.... you might remember the commercials for harmony hairspray
Well she certainly is something..... here are some others who are too
Well you can see that the harmony look was a key factor in enabling these ordinary girls to become angels, crime busters, super heroes of their time, cult figures, gay icons, objects of envy. But it isn't/wasn't only those who became rich and famous, despite their harmony look, that reaped the benefits of the harmony look. Look at the next picture, I choose to call it, the forgotten angel, from her appearance she certainly should have been considered for an avenging role.
Wednesday, April 28, 2004
Well I have been pondering a little bit about bad girls. First of all, I think I missed something which explained how Phyl became top dog, maybe its because she is a posh bird and manages to be the main drug dealer, or maybe its because, along with her side kick bev, they managed to build a makeshift distillery, or maybe it is because even after all her time in prison she still has perfect hair. Now in all the time I have watched this, i haven't seen tony and guy make an appearance, and even if they have been in secretely they seem to have bypassed some of the characters....
this hair cut or non hair cut has drammatically changed from earlier episodes
I refuse to pass comment on the change.But I am sure no professional hairdresser was involved.
So back to Phyls perfect hair, even with poor diet which may be found in Larkhall, even with its supplement of saliva and anything else that might be added after cooking, with the lack of sunlight, exercise and anything else that makes a human thrive, I fail to see that even under these conditions hair would refuse to grow, and if it were that hair growth was affected, surely that said, affected hair, would not be in a good condition, would have lost its shine, would lack body, wouldnt have that harmony hairspray look(which i will expand on, in another entry..that is a whole story itself). So, maybe it is the ability to have perfect hair that makes Phyl topdog.
You will notice in this picture that her hair is sleek, and shows a certain softness that we all strive for. Even her roots haven't really begun to show, neither have they had to be redone, I believe it is this remarkable apptitude and ability to overcome the larkhall environment that makes her top dog. This last picture Illustrates in more detail, her resilience, here she is shown with Bev, her cell mate, who has spent the same time as Phyl in jail, and shared the same cell with her.
In conclusion, to be TOPDOG in anything, get perfect hair.These are some examples of hair that won't make it to the top.
Monday, April 26, 2004
Aoccdrnig to a rscheearchr at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteers are in the rgiht pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae we do not raed ervey lteter by it slef but the wrod as a wlohe.
Sunday, April 25, 2004
This weeks unconscious mutterings
hehehehe...bit pre occupied with not smoking..will do it properly now
click here to play.. post the answers in my forum if you have no where else to put them.
- Elastic:: cigarette
- Intervention:: smoke it
- Risk:: smoking
- Junk food:: ciggies
- Arrogance:: smoke
- Responsibility:: smoking
- X:: smoker
- Marshall:: smoke
- Kill:: smoking
- Brother:: doesn't smoke
hehehehe...bit pre occupied with not smoking..will do it properly now
- Elastic:: band
- Intervention:: treatment
- Risk:: chance
- Junk food:: crisps
- Arrogance:: twattiness
- Responsibility:: take some
- X:: factor
- Marshall::ward
- Kill:: bill
- Brother:: beyond
click here to play.. post the answers in my forum if you have no where else to put them.
Well, helen steiner rice, inspirational poet...... inspiring who? Inspirational to all situations, all people at all times??? Hmmmm I don't know about that, a few wise words she comes out with, tarts them up into a little verse, with some rhyming bits, and for many, well the words hit home, they help to lift, help remind them that a struggle is worthwhile, that they have the strength to carry on...
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit-
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.
Come on helen!!!!!!!! I quit smoking today, quitting isn't all bad!!!
seriously though, today we gave up smoking, no bad temper yet, but who knows, watch this space.
Thursday, April 22, 2004
BUT
Its not like that for all songs, there are some songs that if you dub over all of the swear words, theres precious little left, they must sound like a radio with a stutter.
Here are a couple that I have come across, that i really cannot imagine what the dubbed swear free versions would sound like, the first I am informed is played lots on the radio, and does sound amusing.
Its by Eamon
F*** It (I Don't Want You Back)
Whoa oh oh
Ooh hooh
No No No
[Verse 1:]
See, I dont know why I liked you so much
I gave you all, of my trust
I told you, I loved you, now thats all down the drain
Ya put me through pain, I wanna let u know how I feel
[Chorus:]
F*** what I said it dont mean s*** now
F*** the presents might as well throw em out
F*** all those kisses, they didn't mean jack
F*** you, you hoe, I dont want you back
F*** what I said it dont mean s*** now
F*** the presents might as well throw em out
F*** all those kisses they didn't mean jack
F*** you, you hoe, I dont want you back
[Verse 2:]
You thought, you could
Keep this s*** from me, yeah
Ya burnt b****, I heard the story
Ya played me, ya even gave him head
Now ya askin for me back
Ya just another act, look elsewhere
Cuz ya done with me
F*** what I said it dont mean s*** now
F*** the presents might as well throw em out
F*** all those kisses they didn't mean jack
F*** you, you hoe, I dont want you back
F*** what I said it dont mean s*** now
F*** the presents might as well throw em out
F*** all those kisses they didn't mean jack
F*** you, you hoe, I dont want you back
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
Ya questioned, did I care
You could ask anyone, I even said
Ya were my great one
Now its, over, but I do admit I'm sad.
It hurts real bad, I cant sweat that, cuz I loved a hoe
F*** what I said it dont mean s*** now
F*** the presents might as well throw em out
F*** all those kisses they didn't mean jack
F*** you, you hoe, I dont want you back
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
and in response
This is Frankee's Rebuttal to Eamon's song
Oh oh
oooh
no no no
(You know there's two sides to every story)
See I don't know why you cryin' like a b****
talkin' s*** like a snitch
Why you write a song 'bout me
If you really didn't care
You wouldn't wanna share
Tellin' everybody just how you feel
×CHORUS×
F*** What I did, was your fault somehow
F*** the presents, I threw all that s*** out
F*** all the cryin' it didn't mean jack
Well guess what yo, f*** you right back
F*** What I did, was your fault somehow
F*** the presents, I threw all that s*** out
F*** all the cryin' it didn't mean jack
Well guess what yo, f*** you right back
You thought you could really make me moan
I had better sex all alone (ha ha ha ha)
I had to do your friend
now you want me to come back
you must be smokin' crack
Im goin' else where and thats a fact
F*** all those nights I moaned real loud
f*** it, I faked it, aren't you proud?
f*** all those nights you thought you broke my back
well guess what joe,your sex was wack
*** all those nights I moaned real loud
f*** it, I faked it, aren't you proud?
f*** all those nights you thought you broke my back
well guess what joe,your sex was wack
ooh ooh
uh uh yea
ooh ooh
uh uh yea
ooh ooh
uh uh yea
ooh ooh
uh uh yea
You questioned did I care
maybe I would have if woulda come to me
now it's over
but I do admit i'm glad I didn't catch your crabs
I can't sweat that cause Im not ur hoe
CHORUS
F*** What I did, was your fault somehow
F*** the presents, I threw all that s*** out
F*** all the cryin' it didn't mean jack
Well guess what yo, f*** you right back
ooh ooh
uh uh yea
ooh ooh
uh uh yea
ooh ooh
uh uh yea
ooh ooh
uh uh yea
(you made me do this)
I think, without looking to deeply into it, that these contain the most swearing, well off the top of my head anyways, I am sure I know others if I sat and thought about it. In the meantime if you know of other songs that won't say anything at all without the swear words taken out, please leave a message in the forum.
Heres something, a friend, sent to me. thought you might like to read it.
CAT:
1) Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As the cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.
2) Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.
3) Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.
4) Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.
5) Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.
6) Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and vigorously rub cat's throat.
7) Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make a note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.
8) Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.
9) Check label to make sure pill is not harmful to humans, drink 1 beer to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.
10) Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.
11) Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of your last tetanus jab. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back another shot. Throw tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.
12) Ring fire brigade to retrieve the friggin' cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.
13) Tie the little @#!*#^~!'s front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining room table, find heavy duty Pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down.
14) Consume remainder of Scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.
15) Arrange for SPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and ring local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.
DOG: Wrap pill in bacon, cheese or peanut butter. Make him beg.
CAT:
1) Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As the cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.
2) Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.
3) Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.
4) Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.
5) Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.
6) Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and vigorously rub cat's throat.
7) Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make a note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.
8) Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.
9) Check label to make sure pill is not harmful to humans, drink 1 beer to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.
10) Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.
11) Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of your last tetanus jab. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back another shot. Throw tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.
12) Ring fire brigade to retrieve the friggin' cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.
13) Tie the little @#!*#^~!'s front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining room table, find heavy duty Pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down.
14) Consume remainder of Scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.
15) Arrange for SPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and ring local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.
DOG: Wrap pill in bacon, cheese or peanut butter. Make him beg.
Tuesday, April 20, 2004
Click on the title above for something amusing.
WARNING
Don't click if you are offended by swearing and profanity.
Monday, April 19, 2004
Rainbow climbing high.
Everyone can see it climbling
Through the sky.
Paint the whole world with a rainbow!
Children's programmes are not always what they seem, I remember once hearing Hectors house playing in the background, and without seeing what was happening on screen, it was full of innuendoes. I think maybe this is so the programmes have some adult appeal too... and some of the characters in the shows, well leave you with a lot to think about . Here is a script from a british cult children's show ..Rainbow... this script was probably done as a piss take, because it wasn't actually screened.. I don't think, but it is amusing...
The sketch opens with Zippy peeling a banana ...
Zippy:
One skin, two skin, three skin, four
George:
Zippy, where is Bungle?
Zippy:
I think Geoffrey is trying to get him up
We see a view of the door and hear Bungle moaning from behind it.
Bungle:
Geoffrey, I can't get it in
Geoffrey:
You managed it last night
Bungle:
I know, let's try it round the other way. Ooooooh, I've got it in
Bungle and Geoffrey enter the studio with Bungle carrying a hammer and Peg kit.
Bungle:
Would you stick this on the shelf, George
George:
I can't reach, you'll have to stick it up yourself, Bungle.
Geoffrey (to camera)
Hello everyone, today we are talking about playing
Bungle:
Playing with each other, Geoffrey?
Geoffrey:
Yes Bungle, do you have a special friend that you like to play with?
George:
Yesterday we played with each other's balls. Are we going to play with our friend's balls today?
Bungle:
Yes, and we can play with our twangers as well.
Geoffrey (to camera)
Have you seen Bungles twanger?
Zippy:
Oh I have, I showed him how to pluck with it.
Bungle:
It's my plucking instrument.
Geoffrey asks the audience if they can pluck like Bungle
Zippy:
I can, I'm the best plucker here.
George:
And I'm good at banging. My peg's hard isn't it Zippy?
Zippy:
Well of course it is, your peg wouldn't go in if it was soft.
Geoffrey:
Let's get back to Bungle's twanger.
Bungle:
(excited) Oooooh Geoffrey, we could all play with our twangers couldn't we? Let's play the plucking song. Rod and Freddy can get their instruments out and Jane has got two lovely Maracas.
Singers Rod, Jane and Freddy enter.
Freddy:
We could hear you all banging away
Rod:
Banging can be fun.
Jane:
Ooooh yes, and I was banging away all last night with Rod and Freddy.
Freddy:
( looking sad ) Yes, but it broke my plucking instrument.
Rod:
(to Jane) Do you want to blow on my pipe while I'm twanging away?
Jane:
Oh no, I was banging away with Freddy last night. But would you like to play with my Maracas?
Zippy:
No, let's just pluck away with our twangers.
George:
Yes, it doesn't matter what size our twanger is.
Zippy:
I've got a big red one.
George:
I've only got a tiny twanger. But it works well and I like to play with it.
Geoffrey:
(to viewers) Well, have you got your twangers out? And remember, you can bang your balls at the same time. If you haven't got any, ask a friend if you can play with his. Now, let's all play the plucking song.
Everyone in studio:
Pluck,pluck, pluck along, we're going to Pluck all day.
Saturday, April 17, 2004
AND
HOW DO YOU WIPE YOURS?
This blog is in two parts, because one thing triggered off the other, and to be honest I now do not know which came first, they sort of intermingled I think, which, for the psychologists amongst you, probably says a lot about me.... tell me something I don't know, and I might listen.
You might remember an earlier blog entry about our trip to Madrid, well that was in effect our first step towards stopping smoking, sounds silly? Well its not that silly really, basically cigarettes cost a lot less in spain than they do here, and so our plan was that, whilst on holiday in Madrid we would buy some cigarettes to bring back with us ... with me so far? The plan then being that once they were finished we would not buy any more. So in effect we havent bought any cigarettes in this country, since before we went to madrid, which actually, I am surprised to say has been quite liberating, not having to make sure theres money left for fags, not having to queue up for them, which sometimes takes forever, especially on giro days, not thinking 'chit I have to put on some clothes and run round to the shop before it closes, so that i am not left smoking dogends in the morning'... and it doesn't feel like we are wasting our money on fags. (at the moment its paying for the trip to madrid, but we will then be saving that money to go somewhere else .. so there is our incentive). Well thats a good enough incentive for me, but what others are there?
Of course there are health benefits, and yep most smokers know about them, we all know smoking is bad for us but we still do it. Infact theres no disputing that we are made aware of the health risks everytime we have a cigarette, printed in great big letters are things that say SMOKING KILLS, or SMOKING CAUSES IMPOTENCE, and many more things.But what other things can I look forward to..... besides knowing I won't be smelling like an ashtray, well maybe I will become one of those ex smokers that get on your nerves, coughing and spluttering to make a point if anyone lights up, sucking my teeth and moaning if I am in 100 meters range of cigarette smoke.
You might now be asking where this post is going, I myself am thinking the same, I seem to have got lost somewhere.
OOh yes, so we are giving up smoking, pretty soon infact, sometime next week I think it is!!! So prepare for some mood swings and anything else I can attribute to stopping smoking.I can't say I always enjoy smoking, but there are some cigarettes I enjoy, maybe not the cigarette itself, but the moment. Like chilling after eating, the one before bed, the first one in the morning..which for smokers is often their daily regulator(which links in to the second part of this post). As we don't smoke inside the house, here, we pop into the garden for a ciggie, in winter thats not too pleasant, but in spring, summer and autumn, its usually really nice, especially the early morning one or the ones in the evening, when its quiet and still, giving me chance to just chill out and think about things, or indeed think about nothing.
This morning I was outside when I realised something that I might miss when I stop smoking, and it was that time in the garden. There I was, innocently smoking my lungs out, taking in the morning air with a few mouthfuls of nicotine and other poisons, listening to the birds singing , almost drowning out my coughing and hacking, the bright morning light stinging my eyes as I blink the smoke from them… and I looked up … and yes, regular as clockwork… there was the guy in the house opposite, whose back garden borders with ours, whose bathroom window is opposite ours, whose toilet is by the window in the bathroom opposite ours, whose window blind is never closed, who has frosted glass in the window by the toilet, who does not realise that the frosted glass doesn’t really make it impossible to see inside, because I think if he did realise, he wouldn’t go for a poo in the morning without any clothes on. Now I don’t exactly stand for hours watching the antics of the people opposite, but it has come to my attention that some people do some strange things on the toilet, brush their teeth, roll copious amounts of toilet paper around their hands….. goodness knows how this in actually works when wiping, I am sure the amount rolled is far too thick to effectively wipe .. of course you need to make sure you have enough, or your finger will go through it, but there is also the case for too much. Its also been possible to observe different wiping techniques, the sit and wipe method, the sit wipe look, dispose and flush, the stand up and wipe, the stand up turn round look for a few minutes wipe and then flush, and what I am still trying to work out is the guy who seemingly was doing a yoga pose, or attempting a handstand from sitting, this must have been a technique for pleasure, because it didn’t look at all practical to me, but I also cannot work out what pleasure was gained. Pooing can be as enjoyable as a cigarette, satisfying with a feel good factor, it can also be a pain, constipation is no fun, and on the other extreme neither are the trots. But I won’t go into that for now, its too close to home, and even thinking about it fills me with fear and dread… hehehe..
Do you wipe front to back? Back to front ( all females should be saying no to this one), Do you do front to back and back to front? Do you check the paper to see if you’re clean,? Do you look down the toilet to see what you have done? Do you check after to see if its all gone? Do you get someone else to wipe it for you? Do you neatly fold your tissue or just screw it round and use it??
You can click here to take part in a very quick survey about wiping .
From research it seems that how we wipe and how other people wipe can have an influence on us ... I came across this quote Am I wiping right?
I recently saw a character on TV wiping his bum differently than I had ever done in my life. This perplexed me and got me to wondering if I was doing it right. This led to other questions about how normal I am as well.
you can read more about it by clicking here
For anyone having problems wiping, for whatever reason, this site might help BottomWiper.com
Well. I think its time for a cigarette now, so I will leave you to contemplate your toilet habits, whilst I consider mine.
Friday, April 16, 2004
Good morning, just a quickie for now, I have some ideas for things I want to write about later today, but for now I am just going to show you something someone sent to me, and put some other cool blog links on here, so don't forget to have a look at the links bit.
Heres something that you can have a play about with, if you have a moment to spare, or if like me you are a twat, and get carried away writing all sorts of words. Just click here, and then type a name/word in the little box on the page and wait to see what happens.
Are you bored with that one? well, here is something else, this one is very amusing, of course it may not amuse everyone, and it is hard to say why some would find it amusing and some don't. it is even more difficult to explain why i spent ages on this, playing around, even more, it may be difficult to explain why when given the opportunity to think of and use various verbs, and I am sure each and every one of us have a vast wealth of verbs in our vocabulary, why then ....DO WE ... choose 'rude' ones? Don't despair though, don't think this implies some deep seated fetish, or worrying mental disorder, if you are plaqued with worrying thoughts about yourself, thinking you are obviously 'not right' just remember, someone thought it was a good idea to dress up as a chicken in their living room and act out all these verbs, and who knows, maybe they spend every day like that. who knows ... who cares?
I read something on a message board in a forum I belong to, and thought it was worth posting here, as it ties in a little with things I have said in the past about not judging people, you might not like what someone does but does it necessarily make it wrong? Just because someone thinks differently to you does it make their opinion less valid. I am sure we all know people who have done, or do something that we may not agree with or have a very strong opinion about, and for many of us, thats where it remains, we dislike that act, but not the person. Ok .. I am rambling now, hehehe for a change and getting off the point..... so as I said I saw this on a message board some where, and have lifted it straight from there.
Abortion is a very emotive subject, and this is supposed to just be a time filling post, so i am not going to go into the ins and outs, the various arguments regarding abortion, so please don't make any snap judgements about what my stance on abortion is.
Ok thats all for now, I will be back later I think.
Check the blog links at the side!!!!!
Heres something that you can have a play about with, if you have a moment to spare, or if like me you are a twat, and get carried away writing all sorts of words. Just click here, and then type a name/word in the little box on the page and wait to see what happens.
Are you bored with that one? well, here is something else, this one is very amusing, of course it may not amuse everyone, and it is hard to say why some would find it amusing and some don't. it is even more difficult to explain why i spent ages on this, playing around, even more, it may be difficult to explain why when given the opportunity to think of and use various verbs, and I am sure each and every one of us have a vast wealth of verbs in our vocabulary, why then ....DO WE ... choose 'rude' ones? Don't despair though, don't think this implies some deep seated fetish, or worrying mental disorder, if you are plaqued with worrying thoughts about yourself, thinking you are obviously 'not right' just remember, someone thought it was a good idea to dress up as a chicken in their living room and act out all these verbs, and who knows, maybe they spend every day like that. who knows ... who cares?
I read something on a message board in a forum I belong to, and thought it was worth posting here, as it ties in a little with things I have said in the past about not judging people, you might not like what someone does but does it necessarily make it wrong? Just because someone thinks differently to you does it make their opinion less valid. I am sure we all know people who have done, or do something that we may not agree with or have a very strong opinion about, and for many of us, thats where it remains, we dislike that act, but not the person. Ok .. I am rambling now, hehehe for a change and getting off the point..... so as I said I saw this on a message board some where, and have lifted it straight from there.
Question 1:
If you knew a woman who was pregnant, who had 8 kids already, three who were
deaf, two who were blind, one mentally retarded, and she had syphilis, would
you recommend that she have an abortion?
Read the next question before looking at the answer for this one.
Question 2:
It is time to elect a new world leader, and only your vote counts. Here are
the facts about the three leading candidates.
Candidate A:
Associates with crooked politicians, and consults with astrologists. He's
had two Mistresses. He also chain smokes and drinks 8 to 10 martinis a day.
Candidate B:
He was kicked ou t of office twice, sleeps until noon, used opium in college
and drinks a quart of whiskey every evening.
Candidate C:
He is a decorated war hero. He's a vegetarian, doesn't smoke, drinks an
occasional beer and never cheated on his wife.
Which of these candidates would be your Choice?
Decide first, no peeking, then scroll down for the answer.
v
v
v
v
v
v
Candidate A is Franklin D. Roosevelt.
Candidate B is Winston Churchill.
Candidate C is Adolph Hitler.
Oh, by the way, the answer to the abortion question: If you said yes,
just killed Beethoven.
Abortion is a very emotive subject, and this is supposed to just be a time filling post, so i am not going to go into the ins and outs, the various arguments regarding abortion, so please don't make any snap judgements about what my stance on abortion is.
Ok thats all for now, I will be back later I think.
Check the blog links at the side!!!!!
Wednesday, April 14, 2004
This is excellent. To recalibrate your mouse, click and hold right after the mouth. Then drag the mouth toward the kiss. If it doesn't work, you might want to clean your mouse.
Tuesday, April 13, 2004
HETROPHOPHIA
or just plain ignorance and bigotry?
Ok firstly, I am a lesbian... although personally I prefer the word dyke, if I have to give myself a label. (Dyke itself is a word that comes along with a lot of issues, some hate it, some love it, some are insulted by it, etc etc.. maybe one day i will write about what that word means to me) Ok, so I am a dyke, I didn't choose to be gay, but I choose to be proud, in that I mean I won't make apologies for who I am, I am not hurting anyone, I am not thrusting myself on anyone, if you're one of those people that think what gay people do is unnatural, and it turns your stomach, well, quite simply .....don't think about it, I am certainly not thinking about what you get upto in the privacy of your home. So yes, I am proud of me, I am not ashamed of my sexuality and all that, that involves. Having said that, sometimes I am embarassed to be associated with other lesbians... as a species personally they get on my nerves. That though could also be said for any group I automatically get associated with just because of who I am( e.g, white, english, women, vegetarian etc etc).
I never actually spent time looking into the reasons why I am a dyke, sure I have thought back and can see 'signs' from a very young age, but like I said I never looked for reasons why, I just am, to be looking for reasons, could quite reasonably make it open to the assumption that its a symptom, a symptom of what though? A symptom of something that went wrong, like perhaps a broken leg, or a scar, something that means you have to put up with it or fix it, and to me that suggests its not quite right. This would then give weight to the arguments or the lame responses by some men, oh youre only a lesbian cos you haven't had the right guy yet, or I can cure you of being a lesbian, to be honest, those sort of things make me laugh, and are things that make me feel fortunate that I am a lesbian. It is also quite sad, in a way, that some guys feel their sexuality, their manliness is threatened cos someone is a lesbian... when even if they were straight she probably wouldn't shag you anyway.
I don't dipute that some women have been terribly hurt by men in the past, and thus steer away from relationships with men, and form relationships with women, who is to know if this would have happened without that hurt or not. There are some lesbians, who come across as real men haters, for what ever reasons, some I guess, is from past experiences they have had, some I also believe is showing off, for want of a better term, of trying to fit in with a group, and totally getting it wrong, missing the point, and infact in the long run closing themselves off from a large section of the population.
This behaviour is a lot more obvious in chatrooms, and falls into many categories, theres the people who go on and on about guys, and guys pretending to be women, so much so that they spend their chat time just talking about this and never having a conversation... to me whats the point... quite often this category, in my opinion consists of a big percentage of men, claiming to be women, and thinking this man hating behaviour will identify them as a woman, make them more accepted. WRONG!! Theres also the group of people who strive to be noticed, who have little personality, having taken away their ability to slam other people for whatever reason, poor spelling, gender, etc etc, these people pick up on things that get said often in chatrooms, things that evoke a response, and then overkill it, they go on about it, they totally mistake that a one off put down line or bit of sarcasm can be seen as funny or amusing, they labour the point, they use it inappropriately, they victimise individuals, they damage peoples self esteem, they upset and hurt people, trying to be popular by damning someone else.... unfortunately, this for some people seems to be acceptable, it does work to get people noticed, and so they get to be able to chat about other things, and for some reason other people don't pick them up on things that they say that are outrageous, unnaceptable, prejudiced and unnecessary, I have no clue why. Well actually i have, some is fear, some is apathy, some is for the same reason that behaviour started, to fit in and be noticed, be seen to accept it , find it funny etc, gives you some sort of allegiance and common ground... BOLLOX!!!
I dread to think what these people would be like in the flesh, do they really spout off some of the things that they type in chatrooms, do they really believe it? And the rest, do they idly sit by and watch and listen if someone is being attacked unjustly?
Ok, well women's chatrooms should be that, for women, we all know guys go in them, either as guys or pretending to be women, and so its easy to say, they should have the courtesy to keep away from women only spaces, it is in effect, common coutesy to do this. There are a million and one places where guys can chat with women, there are some places where women chose to be alone with women, for whatever reasons that may be. Some, as already mentioned feel safer with women, they do not trust men, perhaps they have been hurt by men, and are 'tarring' all men with the same brush, now we know this in itself isn't right, not all men ar b*stards, not all men are rapists, but for those who feel this way, men intruding in women only spaces, however polite and well mannered they may be once in there, only serve to feed this stereotype and view.
Ok, so earlier, I was saying that sometimes I get embarassed by association, you see when you're with a group of people with a common grounding... e.g women, lesbians, those into BDSM, maybe women against the bomb, or whatever, whilst you have entered that zone and are a part of that group, you in effect are a sort of ambassador, and example, what you say or do, will have an affect on peoples opinions of that group of people, so if someone goes into a lesbian chatroom for the first time, and finds a group of women just bitching about men and nothing else, what reason do they have to not think lesbians are men haters???? Last night i was in a room and was appalled, there was a guy in there, a guy who often is in there, who doesn't understand the reasons behind why maybe he shouldn't be there, he himself has some pretty stupid and bigotted ideas about things, but there were several women, giving time arguing with him, and once involved in the argument I am not sure if everyone was really conscious of what they were saying, some will get into abusive name calling, now to me all that achieves is to make you look silly, personalising and being abusive, suggests you have no real argument, or lack the ability to formulate your thoughts and ideas, and thus have nothing really to say or for people to listen to, but there was something said that outraged me, made me see the person saying it in a totally different light,
: this short little man just has a messianic inferiority compplex. Straight men are just sperm incubators. There might be merit to them being fathers if they would quit raping and abusing children.
I suppose I could go on about what I think this says, why maybe she said it, but let me leave it to you to think about, I am going to leave it there, with just one word about what I think of that statement
Sunday, April 11, 2004
This weeks game
click here to play yourself ........ if you want you can cut and paste and write them in the forum on my site.
- Boxing:: ring
- Lewis:: lennox
- Bodyguard:: movie
- Burnout:: wiped out
- Cruising:: for a bruising
- Easter:: sunday
- AA:: I know a man who can
- Research:: study
- Redemption:: song
- Snickers:: mmmmmmmmm yummy
click here to play yourself ........ if you want you can cut and paste and write them in the forum on my site.
Friday, April 09, 2004
More like QUADRUPLIN
Well we had a kinda similiar experience last night, all excited we were, having found some cheap flights to dublin, very very cheap infact, like £4.99 outward and £1 return flights... that is just amazing, so, all excited we choose the flights, and click the button and wait, all excited, and then the price comes up..... after adding airport tax and allsorts of other things it is no longer £5.99 for a return to Dublin...... having said that the price isn't too expensive but thats not the point!!!!!!!!!
I did see a very expensive flight from birmingham to dublin.... which isnt really very far at all, it was via Paris..... £733 per person ........ is it in the royal jet or something? I dont even think you get to go look round Paris for that price, and besides paris isnt really on the way from birmingham to dublin, so just what is the point of that!!!!
Wednesday, April 07, 2004
well I really must pull my finger out and think of some things to write in my blogger, but for now I will just do a little update on pets..... and how embarassing they can be ... well you may remember that little poppy has had a bit of a poorly tummy, so the vet advised us to take her in... she really hadn't been herself for a couple of days, she wasn't playing, was pretty much trance like, when she wasn't sleeping, all in all she was worrying us. So off we trundle to the vets, now I had already been earlier with my friend at the teacup and asha... I was thinking they might think I had munschaussen by proxy ala pet or something. Well anyways poor little poppy was a good girl she let the vet prod and poke her tummy, but did register her unrest by emitting an SBD .. silent but deadly .fart!!! right in the vets face... enough to give the diagnosis of an upset tummy .... because of its less than pleasant smell... in retaliation the vet violated the little darling by sticking a thermometer up her bum..... well actually she lubed it first and did it gently... not that poppy seemed to notice the care taken in doing it ... she didnt enjoy it. Well back to starving her for 24 hours now... we came home ...in fear ..would the feral poppycat reappear.. trying to eat us in the absence of food. Well after her painkiller and antibiotic injection she has been returning to her normal self a little more.... she hasn't been feral yet, and fortunately in a couple of hours she can eat again..... cos at the moment she is nibbling teeth marks into anything she can.. magazines, plastic bags, anything and everything she shouldnt be... roll on dinner time....
Hopefully i will write something of wider interest soon
Hopefully i will write something of wider interest soon
Monday, April 05, 2004
Well poppy the cat still isn't very well, she has been back on food since saturday evening, eating chicken and white fish .. not together, so she seemed to have forgiven us for starving her for 24hours, and although she was a little sleepy on saturday and sunday, and seemed a little off colour, it wasn't very worrying, her runny bum had stopped, but more than that she hadnt been for a poo. I thought maybe she was sleeping a bit more on sunday cos of what she was eating, you see normally she eats dried food and just picks at that through the day, but when she has meat or fish she eats it all at once, so I thought she had the sunday dinner syndrome, and wanted to nap after eating. But today, she definitely isnt herself, she has done a poo, but not a proper one really, and she definitely isnt herself, shes listless, lethargic, very sleepy, and limp, and she keeps looking like she is in a trance... well to try and help her constipation, she had some rice cooked for her, and mixed in with some fish. Now when she is well, she will eat rice, not that she has it much, just when she tries to scrounge it when we have it for dinner.... but today, she didnt want her specially cooked rice, but managed to eat the flakes of fish that it was mixed with ..now I dont know how she managed to pick the rice out but she did. Anyways, fingers crossed she will be feeling beter tomorrow, but the vet is going to have a look at her anyways.
this week's unconscious mutterings
- Condemn:: to die
- Promiscuous:: slapper
- Pro-life:: woman's right to choose
- Mona Lisa:: with a cherry on top
- Crown:: jewels
- Mumble:: what did you say?
- Hack:: into
- Diet:: coke
- Introduction:: beginning
- Latin America:: come dancing team
Saturday, April 03, 2004
So what is it with pets making us worry, well our little cat is a bit under the weather, well actually, she isn't really, she seems pretty much herself, cuddly, cheeky, mischevious, but she has had a bit of runny poo for the last three days, and her bum looked a bit red.... not that we make a big habit of looking at it, but anyways we did today, and cos she had a prolapse when she was a kitten we thought we should give the vet a quick ring. GREAT .... starve her for 24 hours he said .... I know they mean well but, deny her food for 24 hours ... do they not know cats are your friends when they choose to be, however, if they were bigger, they would just as soon eat you, if they so desired. Well anyone would think we had starved her for 3 weeks, by the time 3 hours had passed, she was meowing and whinging and throwing out the dirty looks. I am sure she goes 3 hours sometimes, through choice without eating ...but I guess thats the point, through choice, well after about 5 hours, she started to become feral, good job she is only tiny and can only reach to swat our ankles as we walk by her ... we are now upstairs for the night, and wondering if we should barracade ourselves in up here til its time to feed her....I am just going to read up on lion taming and stuff in the meantime .... but poppy...(not that you can read this... because I havent told you the web address :P) but Poppy, we know its not nice, and you're hungry , but it could be worse, we could have done something like this to you
PEZZIE
